If you check in here regularly you know that 17 days ago I took my 11 year old daughter Meghan to the doctor because her right (upper) arm had been sore for a few weeks. I asked for prayers because an xray showed that there was a mass growing on and into the bone. I was thankful in the interim of what we have been dealing with here that I had already prepared some posts to use (Book Week) because I was not ready to share what was really happening here on the homefront. However, I have decided to put it out there because the more prayer warriors we have, the better. Meghan has been diagnosed with osteosarcoma which is a type of bone cancer. I am pasting below all of the emails I have sent out over our church's prayer chain and to family and friends. I will try to update here regularly from now on as well.
Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. Hebrews 10:23
***************************************************************************************
Sent 12/20/07:
Yesterday (Wednesday) was a long day. We left at 5:00 am to drive over to Beaumont Hospital in Royal Oak (near Detroit). Meghan's surgery
was performed around 9:00 am. The pathologist was on hand to look at
the biopsy sample and we were able to receive the results already. The
sample confirmed that Meghan has osteosarcoma.
Meghan is doing well - she is home from school today because her arm is
very sore. We will be leaving later to go down to DeVos Children's
Hospital for the bone scan. She is very much looking forward to going
to school tomorrow (it's the last day before the holiday break and they
have lots of special stuff planned). We will thankfully have the
weekend through Christmas together at home as a family.
Please pray for peace and strength as we look toward next week. On the
day after Christmas (Wednesday), Meghan will have the surgery to
install her port and she will stay and begin her first round of chemo.
If nothing else happens before Christmas, I want to make sure that I
take this opportunity to wish all of you and your families a blessed
Christmas. It is my prayer that you will focus on the precious gift of
Jesus that we celebrate and find much peace and joy in doing so. We
appreciate your prayers and encouragement so very much and we covet
them for the coming new year as well.
If you have time I want to encourage you to read this article (click for a link). I "happened" to come across it earlier and it was a real
encouragement to me.
Hebrews 10:23 Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for
he who promised is faithful.
Standing on His Promises,
Michele (for the Haan family)
****************************************************************************************
Sent 12/18/07:
Dear Friends:
Just wanted to give everyone an update on Meghan. This week is turning
into a whirlwind of activity and appointments. Monday we were over in
Royal Oak for the appointment with the surgeon. We found out why we are
driving to the other side of the state - there are only 3 surgeons in
the state of Michigan that are qualified to handle Meghan's case, and
the one we are seeing is considered the best (plus one of the other two
is on maternity leave right now). She is very optimistic that Meghan's
arm can be saved. (Praise the Lord!) At this point she is hoping to be
able to keep Meghan's own elbow joint and shoulder joint, but she will
remove the whole bone between the two and replace it with a cadaver
bone. This surgery will take place farther down the road (after the
initial 3-4 months of chemo).
Today (Tuesday) we met with the oncologist at DeVos Children's Hospital.
They started with lab work and then we went up to the pediatric oncology
unit of the hospital. This is where we will be spending a lot of time
over the next year. We met with the doctor and also got a tour of the
unit. Meghan will initially be in chemo for 3 - 4 months. She will be
admitted to the hospital for 3-5 days at a time and then have 1-2 weeks
off in between rounds. There may be additional times she will be
admitted (if she gets a fever or if she develops mouth and throat sores,
which can be a side effect of the chemo that would limit her ability to
eat and drink). She will definitely lose her hair (probably around day
14). She will also periodically receive blood transfusions to help
counter-act the chemo's effect on her bone marrow. When she is admitted,
she will be in a private room with its own bathroom and Michael or I
will be able to stay with her and even sleep there overnight. She will
also be allowed to have visitors (we will let you know more about that
when we have more specific information). It was kind of hard at first to
be there because there are a lot of sick kids everywhere you look (so
many even younger than Meghan) but it also made me realize that there is
such a bigger picture - so many others dealing with this - it helped me
to not be so inwardly focused. It helped to start thinking about how to
connect to these other hurting families and maybe even find ways to
bless them in the midst sharing this trial of having a child with cancer.
Tomorrow we are going back to Royal Oak for the first surgery to get the
bone biopsy. This is an outpatient surgery so we should be back late
afternoon. They will have the results of the biopsy later in the week.
They are still saying it is one of three cancers - osteosarcoma (most
likely), ewings sarcoma, or lymphona. Which of these it is will
determine the combination of drugs for chemo and the course of it.
Thursday we will be down at Butterworth in the late afternoon and
evening for a bone scan. A pet scan has also been ordered but we don't
know when that will be yet. These are both tests to help determine if
there are any other places in her body where the cancer is growing.
Friday through Christmas day we will get a little respite (thankfully).
We are looking forward to spending some much-needed family time over the
weekend and holiday.
Then... next week Wednesday (the day after Christmas), Meghan will go in
for another surgery to have a central line installed in her chest. They
gave her the option of a broviac (not sure if I spelled that right)
which is tube/catheder coming out of the chest or a port which is under
the skin. The disadvantage of the port is that they still have to poke
her each time to insert a needle into the port but they give her a
numbing cream beforehand and the advantage is that 24 hours after
they've accessed it, she can do things like go swimming, shower, etc..
Meghan has decided on the port. It will be in for the next year or so
and will enable the doctors and nurses to administer chemo, other
medicines, and draw blood more easily than having to put in an i.v. each
time. She will be staying in the hospital after the surgery to begin her
first round of chemo (not sure how many days yet).
This is all happening very fast and at times it feels like we haven't
been able to catch our breath yet or reflect on it all. I do know that
the reality of what we are facing is really starting to sink in. There
is nothing we can do except to cling to God's promise that He will not
give us more than we can handle - He will equip us for what He is
calling us to. He has a purpose in all of this that is greater than what
we can fathom. Please pray for continued strength and peace - this
journey is just beginning.
I put together a journaling "kit" for Meghan along with a blank journal.
I asked her permission to share with you what she wrote on her opening
page and she said it would be o.k.:
CANCER KEEPER -
A place to keep thoughts, feelings, and pains. A place to write down
your innermost thoughts. Where I can record my journey through cancer
and faith, with all the joys and sorrows that come with it. So one day,
when I am past the pain and have past the test, to look back and see how
God has worked and blessed me. Amen
She is an amazing beautiful gift and we have been so blessed and humbled
by her response to everything happening so far. All praise and glory to
our King!
I know this is already very long but I wanted to share one last thing
with you. We subscribe to an email devotional called "Slice of Infinity"
from Ravi Zacharias International Ministries and this link is today's
reading. It was a blessing to us and I hope it will be to you as well.
In Christ,
Michele
*********************************************************************************************
Sent 12/17/07:
Dear Friends,
I just needed to share with you an incredible way that God has blessed
us and
provided for our needs. Some of you may know that back in October our
minivan had an engine fire and was totaled (photos here:
http://greenchairstudio.typepad.com/green_chair_studio/2007/10/index.html.
) Our insurance pretty much only covered what we owed on it and we
haven't been able to afford to replace it. Since then, Mik has been
taking the bus to work everyday and I've been driving his car which is
a '92 Volkswagon Passat with over 200,000 miles on it and numerous
quirks and problems. When we got Meghan's diagnosis (and especially
finding out that one of her doctors was going to be on the east side of
the state) our need for a reliable and safe vehicle became much more
urgent but we were still not in a position financially to do anything
about it. Here is where God has amazed us - last night (Saturday) two
couples from our church came over to our house and presented us with a
beautiful '05 Grand Caravan minivan that people from our church family
all secretly donated to and surprised us with. You cannot imagine how
overwhelmed and stunned we were/are. You cannot imagine what a burden
has been lifted! To know that we have a safe, reliable vehicle to
transport Meghan back and forth to all her appointments and to not have
the added financial strain at this time of a car payment - it is simply
too much for words to adequately express. "Glorify the Lord with me;
let us exalt his name together." Psalm 34:3
Following is a testimony of gratitude that Michael shared with our
church
family today during the morning service today:
"Me and my extended family wish to express our deep and
heartfelt
thanks to you. What you have been moved by the Spirit to do in the
name of Christ is amazing. Words fail me and I believe that they are
supposed to. Nothing is eloquent enough to describe how God is and
moves. After singing the doxology in our kitchen last night I began to
reflect on how it is an amazing, overwhelming, and humbling thing to
experience God pouring out His love, grace, and mercy through the body
of Christ. Words cannot express either the burdens carried or lifted
this past week. When the Lord places such a test before us we
sometimes get lost in the questions and details of the test and start
to miss the point. Praise be to God that he does not leave us there.
Through you all, in ways that may not even be apparent to you, God is
re-focusing our vision not on the test itself but the purpose of the
test. We will all be challenged by this or something else. In this
God strengthens us and our faith, exercises the body, and reminds us
that we are indeed created not for our own pleasure, but in all
circumstances, to give thanks, praise, honor, and glory to the One who
was, who is, and is to come.
We thank you, appreciate you, and love you for sharing in this test.
However, we invite you to join us to no longer focus on the test itself
but to the answer where it points. To an unchangeable, Holy, loving
and omnipotent God; His son, our savior, who endured hell itself so
that, in times such as these, the Holy Spirit himself intercedes for us
with groanings too deep for words when we know not what or how we ought
to pray. And pray we must.
We ask that you continue to pray. Not only for Meghan and our family,
but for all those undergoing a test. That we may see His hand and feel
His peace. That we may rest on His perfect sovereign will and that His
name be praised! After all, no struggle or sacrifice we encounter can
ever compare to the price that was paid for us by Jesus Christ himself.
May this be a reminder for us and a light and a testimony to a dark and
needy world. May we all be used for His glory in the unfolding of His
good and perfect will. For it is only by His grace we are able to
sing, 'Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow,' and what an amazing believable
grace it is."
Our new van has been dubbed "The Grace Mobile." A couple people said
to me that "no one deserves this more than you guys," but that, my
friends, is wrong. No one deserves this less than us and that
is what makes it so amazing - it is sheer grace! This is just one
of the many ways that God has blessed us already and I just
wanted to share it with you.
With deep gratitude,
Michele (for the Haan family)
***********************************************************************************************
Sent 12/14/07:
We met with the pediatric orthopedic specialist today. He has confirmed
that we are definitely dealing with cancer. It is most likely
osteosarcoma, with a possibility of being Ewings sarcoma or a form of
leukemia. They will do a bone biopsy surgery to confirm which of these
cancers it is. They will also be doing a full body bone scan to make
sure there are no other tumors growing anywhere else. We are going to
meet with the surgeon on Monday. The surgeon we have been referred to
is over in Royal Oak (on the east side of the state). She is known as
the best surgeon in the state for dealing with these types of cases.
She will schedule and perform the biopsy surgery and will also be the
one to perform a more extensive surgery later on to remove the tumor and
repair the damage it has caused to Meghan's arm. On Tuesday we will
meet with the oncologist assigned to the case working out of DeVos
Children's Hospital here in Grand Rapids. Meghan will begin
chemotherapy as soon as possible. They will hit her hard with the chemo
going into this. Chemo will be followed by the surgery at a later
date. The surgery will then be followed by more chemo. The doctor
indicated that we are looking at at least 1 year of treatment.
Meghan now knows everything that is going on and how we are moving
forward with the treatment. Today has been very up and down for her -
we have shared many tears and hugs and prayers, but we have also shared
laughter and the pure joy of having such an amazing daughter (ok - I
know I'm slightly biased). She is holding up amazingly well and has
even exercised her sense of humor and quick wit throughout the day. She
is understandably scared and overwhelmed at times, but it is such a
blessing to see her already claiming and standing on God's precious
promises to her. Continue to pray for God's abundant grace and peace to
rest upon her and carry her through this trial. We have a long road
ahead of us but we know that God goes before us and that He will equip
us with what we need to walk through this. In Christ alone our hope is
found.
Thank you for the outpouring of love, support, and prayers we have
already received. We are so thankful for the many ways God is blessing
us already in the midst of this.
In Him,
Michele
*************************************************************************************************
Sent 12/13/07:
This is very difficult for me to write. We received the preliminary
reports from the radiologist who read Meghan's CT scan and MRI. I will
save all the medical jargon and tell you that the MRI results are
showing that we are most likely dealing with cancer. There are phrases
like "representative of aggressive malignancy," and "extensive
involvement." The radiologist wrote, "I suspect that this represents
osteosarcoma [which is bone cancer], less likely Ewing sarcoma." The
CT scan came back clear which is good (meaning that the cancer has not
likely spread to her chest). Of additional concern however is "cortical
breakthrough and areas of likely cortical destruction."
We are still scheduled to meet with the specialist from DeVos Children's
Hospital on Friday morning at 10:30 am. *Meghan does not know about
these results yet.* We are going to let her get through her day at
school tomorrow (Thursday). Please pray for her as we move forward
through this. Pray for the doctors to have wisdom in treating her.
Pray for Michael and I to be strong and to know how to best help her
through this. Pray for our younger children as they have yet to know
about any of this. Pray for miraculous healing for our precious
daughter! Just pray - we have an awesome and mighty God who hears the
prayers of His people!
We know that God is good. He has a plan for all of this. Please pray
that we continue to rest in Him and trust Him even when we don't
understand why this is happening.
Phil 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by
prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard
your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your
God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my
righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains
fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the
mountains quake with their surging. There is a river whose streams make
glad the city of God, the holy place where the Most High dwells. God is
within her, she will not fall; he lifts his voice, the earth melts. The
LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Come and
see the works of the LORD, the desolations he has brought on the earth;
he breaks the bow and shatters the spear, he burns the sheilds with
fire. "Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the
nations, I will be exalted in the earth." The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress." Psalm 46
Resting in Him,
Michele
************************************************************************************************
Sent 12/07/07:
Good morning...
Just wanted to give everyone a quick update. The radiologist reviewing
Meghan's x-rays has decided he wants a more comprehensive MRI and also a
CT scan. Because the original MRI appointment was scheduled for Saturday
morning and the location at which it was scheduled does not have all the
equipment necessary, it has been re-scheduled for this week Sunday
morning (December 9) at 5:30 am at Metro Hospital. They will be doing a
MRI with contrast and a CT scan of the chest. We will probably not
receive any information at that time. The next thing following is an
appointment with a pediatric orthopedic specialist which has been
scheduled for Friday morning, December 14. Please continue to pray for
us as we wait to find out what the Lord has planned for us. Some of you
have asked if Meghan is in a lot of pain. It is not too bad - more of a
dull aching which worsens at night and at this point can be treated with
Tylenol or Advil. She is continuing with her normal school routine and
other activities. Continue to pray for her - that she will not feel
anxious about the days ahead and that she will trust in the Lord and
rest in His love and care for her.
Resting in Him,
Michele (for the Haan family)
*************************************************************************************************
Sent 12/05/07:
This is a prayer request that went out over our church prayer chain but
we wanted to pass it along to all of you as well.
Please keep our family in your prayers. Michele brought Meghan to the
doctor yesterday (Tuesday) because she has been experiencing pain in her
right arm for a few weeks. We were thinking that she pulled some
muscles or something like that. Anyway, they ended up doing an x-ray of
the arm and discovered that there is a fairly large mass growing on and
into the bone (between her elbow and shoulder). They have scheduled an
MRI for Saturday morning and we will be meeting with a pediatric
orthopedic specialist early next week. The doctor indicated that even
in the best case scenario of the mass being benign there is still bone
damage and thinning that will be of concern. Please pray for peace and
comfort for Meghan. We are answering her questions but not giving her
too much information right now until we know more of what we are dealing
with. Please pray that we will all rest in God's sovereign and perfect
plan for us. Thank you!
Isaiah 43:1-3 Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by
name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters I will be with
you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you;
when you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will
not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of
Israel, your Savior.
